Randomness

The 2012 London Olympic Logo

2007-06-06T22:06:00.000-05:00

Time frame for monstrosity to be designed :1 year(!)

Cost :A whopping $800,000(!!)

The icing on the cake :Its animated version may trigger epileptic seizures(!!!)

Drug Song

2007-05-25T14:59:00.001-05:00

This was hilarious!

p.s:Excuse the french at the end. :)

The Craving

2007-05-22T11:51:00.000-05:00

The Craving:

And *sigh*
The Anti-Craving:
Nutrition Facts
Serving Size 1 Tall drink
Amount Per Serving
Calories 370 Calories from Fat 135

Happy Birthday D!

2007-05-14T18:55:00.000-05:00

It was D's birthday today. Saad reckoned he ought to make her a birthday card when he got back home from school(and saw the card I had got her...heh)....here it is.

The Front:

The Center:

and(this has to take the prize for narcissism)The Back:

Whine log (you didn't think I was done?did you?)

2007-05-10T16:38:00.000-05:00

A month away from step 3 and Aya hasn't done crap...ok...I've done some crap but that crap isn't enough to get me a passing score. I am finding it exceedingly difficult to get down to some serious studying. The start of this week was to officially be the start of some "No-monkeying-around-serious-studying" time....but it didn't happen and it wasn't my fault entirely. I had to get a TB test done as part of the pre-employment health screen this Monday. This is to screen for active or latent TB in yours truly.I am to be there personally again,on Friday, to get the results.Now, I certainly don't have active TB because I don't have any of the symptoms but coming from a country where TB is prevalant and having had exposure to quite a few TB patients because we had a two week rotation at the city's TB hospital, means there'd be a few of those bugs hiding somewhere in my body.I am probably going to test postive for latent TB and then will have to take prohylactic medication to eradicate the darn bug so that ; number 1 -It doesn't get activated and give me TB while I am working on the hospital floors and number 2 - I don't give the bug to any patients that I come in contact with. All this makes sense...now heres the scary bit...the prophylactic medicine is NASTY. It has side effects....so?all meds have side effects you say? Sure...they all do but did you not notice the NASTY? It can mess up your nerves and make you have peripheral neuropathy - pins and needles and numbness etc. Also, its not too kind to Mr. Liver and can cause drug induced hepatitis. Anyways, I am not as worried and paranoid as I may come across to be about this issue because if I have to take it I have to take it. No shortcuts there.
So, I took care of that on Monday. Tuesday was an ok day. Wednesday just sucked generally because I wasn't feeling well and today I had to help my mother get some paperwork done and tutor this one kid I've been helping with reading and comprehension, so the day was pretty much shot.Tomorrow...its say hello to the TB test results and then a show up at my hospital's HR department for a background check. I am wondering how they'd go about the background check though ; as if filling out all those weird forms and giving out my social security information etc didn't cut it.
Now, back to where I started ; I can't get myself to study. What to do? I've actually known the answer to this worry of mine all along and I've conveniently been blocking it.I need to start going to the cold cold library...and make it my *gulp* home.No shortcuts here either.Adios world....heh...nah,it won't be that hard core...I'll probably keep blogging every now and then.

p.s: If someone wants to berate me over not studying and whining about it-Don't.You'll make me cry. :P

Almost Dusk

2007-05-07T21:03:00.000-05:00

I couldn't help but notice the interplay of shades of blue and the tinge of crimson in the sky, as D and I drove back home this evening.I was quite sure the picture wouldn't come out too great because I took it from inside the moving car.I am pleasantly surprised though ;somehow it gives more of an oil painting feel.

Cingular Commercial - 'BFF Jill'

2007-05-01T19:52:00.001-05:00

I love this commercial!

The Astrotrek Essay by Saad

2007-04-23T19:26:00.000-05:00

So,Saad aka the brat aka laddoo is heading out to space camp at the NASA space center in Huntsville,Alabama come May. He is among a hundred students that were selected out of over six hundred in his school. I loved how they were asked to write essays about why they want to go to this camp and why they in particular should be selected. They were also to get recommendation letters from their fifth grade teachers in elementary school.It was all so official what with the letters being sealed and stamped. Anyways, based on the essay he wrote which I've been meaning to post here for a while now, I am certain he won't have any trouble writing personal statements (for whatever reason)when he grows up.Enjoy!

"
Why I want to go to Astrotrek.

By Saad

I would like to sign up and go to Astrotrek for many reasons. First of all, I have a great liking for both math and science. Second, I would like to increase my knowledge of space and the natural world. Also, I think it would be a great experience for me and many other students. Furthermore, I know that it would be a great chance for me and many others to go to an actual space program, experience what it is like being in space, and doing many other activities that scientists’ and astronauts’ go through most every day.
One of the reasons I, individually, should go is because I have tried extremely hard to keep my grades up. I was hoping to go to Astrotrek since I first heard about it in 4th grade. It has been one of my many goals in sixth grade and in my opinion it is one of my most important goals. I have behaved very well, achieved a lot of excellent grades and have gotten a lot of great titles while I have been at the Sixth Grade Station. Along with that I am a good role model; polite, and kind.
Moreover, I think I might be interested in a career in Science when I come of age. For example I am very interested in the space, stars, and sky so I might have a career as an Astronomer. Astrotrek will help me understand and gain knowledge of how scientists’ work every day.
Another reason I think I should go to the Astrotrek Space Program is that I’ve heard from my Science teacher that in Astrotrek you get to see a real spaceship and you get to make your own small rocket and hot air balloon, plus you get to do a lot of other wonderful experiments. As I said I take a liking to doing labs, so I would love to watch and do many marvelous experiments or demonstrations.
I am also interested in how the space program affects our everyday lives. Plus, I would want to know the history of the station. Along with learning about the Space Program, I would be very anxious to try the simulations and learn how it actually feels to go out into space like an astronaut. I know it would be great to experience the life of an astronaut in a simulation. Also, I would like to gain some knowledge on what devices astronauts use in the shuttle/Space Station and what the scientists at the base use to communicate and interact with the shuttle.
Other than that, I have many questions that will most probably be answered if I go to the Space Program. For example, I am very interested in the planets’ orbit and revolution around the sun. I would also like to learn about why the other planets are so different from planet Earth and how the gravitational pull on the Earth works. Overall, I would like to know the answers to many of my questions and I think I can accomplish that by going to Astrotrek.
That is my essay on why I want to go to the Astrotrek space program."

Are You Smarter Than A First Grader?

2007-04-20T22:52:00.000-05:00

From time to time,I volunteer to give small science talks to first graders at the school where my mother teaches. Its quite an experience and always gives me something to smile and laugh about. No matter how many times I tell them that their questions will be taken and answered once I am done talking, there's always a handful of them who'd raise their hands in the midde of it all, ever so eagerly,all wide-eyed."Yes?Do you have a question?",I say.A nod and an ahan later they get permission to ask the question only to be followed by an "ummm,I forgot". They are all really intelligent and inquisitve and ever so often they have questions that have me stumped. For example, the time when I talked to them about the skeleton. I had taken in a little plastic skeleton model to point out the different bones and just when I was almost done a little girl raised her hand and asked,"Aya,is that a boy or a girl?".Two years out of medical school and about five down from those anatomy lessons on differentiating male and female skeletons on the basis of which notch was deeper on what bone, I truly was at a loss.So,I told the little girl that I couldn't tell and that someone who was an expert at differetiating "girl and boy bones" would probably be able to answer that question...heh.The puzzled look on her face could very well be translated into a "But I thought you were a doctor!".
Another amusing exchange took place while I talked to them about the digestive system. I was telling them about food being absorbed by the intestine when I heard a kid sitting in the front row ask another, albeit in a loud whisper,"So, what happens to food our body doesn't want?". The answer,"What do you think poop is, silly?!".So, we eventually talked about poop amongst a lot of "ewwwww-s" and "yuk-s"(courtesy the girls in the class).Anyways,just when I thought it was over and done with, this one kid who I think is the smartest of the bunch shot up his hand and said,"I know another name for poop!". Expecting him to use the scientific term "feces" (this kid knows what arteries are and even the name of the smallest bone in the human body!) I gave him the go ahead and he said,"Its dung!"...heh.I wonder how many kids actually caught on to "dung" and used the word at home!
On a serious note though,my interaction with these kids often makes me wonder about education back home and how its different from what kids get here.There is need for improvement in a lot of quadrants but theres one thing that always stands out, at least in my eyes. Now, I draw upon my experience as a child growing up and it might be different now or so I hope. Its how there was never any encouragement to question what was being taught.It was there in the text or the notes and thats the way it was. In time, this practise,I believe totally sucks the life out of what should be an enjoyable and rewarding learning experience. It breeds unmotivated learners, blunts mental development and I'd go as far as saying that it has a bearing on moulding a child's personality. Private schools in Pakistan are probably implementing a change in startegy but what I'd love to see,some day, is for this to happen at all the government run local schools too.

Six Weird Things About Me

2007-04-19T15:31:00.000-05:00

I owe this tag to Que sera sera who tagged me eons ago.

1.Even though I don't consider myself to have a particularly sweet tooth, I just have to have something sweet after lunch and dinner(much like ques sera sera) and these days its a handful of my little brother's cocoa puffs cereal(he ofcourse doesn't know I've been stealing).
2.I hate leaving voice messages and do so very rarely.
3.I have adirectionia (don't look the term up--its randomly coined.It means I have no sense of direction). I find it very hard to remember (and give) directions off the top of my head and actually get around because I've set(weird)landmarks(like that big billboard,this old chruch and that tree).That said, give me a long journey and printed out mapquest directions...I am the best navigator ever!Now thats a paradox if ever there was one.
4.I am a compulsive jasmine green tea drinker.A massive mug full of that stuff with lemon/lime is the ideal remedy for my post-pig-out guilt trips.
5.I haven't had red meat in over ten years!The terrible cooks in the dorm kitchens(of the two colleges I spent time at) are patially to blame....them and my first day in the anatomy dissection hall.
6.I can not and do not window shop.Aimless browsing at the mall would be in my list of least favourite things to do.

I tag whoever wants to be tagged. :)
I remember Rai tagging me ages ago but since he killed his blog and with that the tag I shall consider my self not obligated.Next in line is the freak(Beautiful stranger)who's come up with her very own rather mind boggling tag....so...umm..stay tuned?

More "DP News"

2007-04-14T17:17:00.000-05:00

The familiar monotonous drone of the USPS truck going around the neighbourhood delivering mail was a source of nervous excitement for me these past two days.I'd stand by the window peeking through the blinds and watch the mailman put the mail into our mailbox and wait for him to leave.Then, I'd rush out,get the mail and as I walked back to the front door, I'd leaf through the envelopes to see if what I'd been waiting for was here or not. And today, it came...DP's step 2 score report was finally here!
I opened the envelope praying for it to be an awesome score and thats exactly what it was, alhamdulillah!DP scored an amazing 96/238 on his step 2 exam!! I couldn't be happier or be more proud of him!I called him to let him know the good news but not surprisingly his cell phone was turned off...it being his wedding today. So, I've shot him an email with his score in the subject line (as per his instructions) so he won't have to wait for the page to load (and have a minor coronary..heh).Its his valima tomorrow but knowing him he'd log in to check his mail and find out about his score and I bet it'll more than double his joy!

Antoine Dufour - Spiritual Groove

2007-04-13T11:40:00.001-05:00

Captivated

2007-04-12T20:26:00.000-05:00

.

2007-04-12T09:59:00.000-05:00

If you can't find
what you're looking for
Look again
at what you've found

DP's Wedding

2007-04-11T11:22:00.000-05:00

My friend DrPak aka DP is getting married in two days!! Thats right...two days!(For those of you who know DP ;It sounds sudden because it is sudden!). DP and F have been engaged for four years now and a nikah was in the works for round about this time before he headed out to the US in pursuit of a residency.However, two days ago his and F's family decided on going ahead with not only the nikah but the whole shebang. DP leaves for the US a little over a week after his wedding and F should be joining him as soon as her visa gets sorted out inshaAllah.I am thrilled for the two of them mashaAllah and would've loved to have been there. Too bad I can't but I think I am playing my part quite alright all the way from here, by bugging him and perhaps making him feel a little edgy with stuff like "OMG!I can't believe you're getting married!" , " Have you picked out your ties yet?" , "Do you know what color her dress is?...make sure the color of your tie doesn't clash with it." ," Have you made all your phone calls to invite people?"and well lots more...heh.I hope everything goes perfectly and that the two of them are blessed with a blissful and happily married life inshaAllah!

Photo Implosion

2007-04-09T17:07:00.000-05:00

I came across this blog not too long ago courtesy Que sera sera's links and fell in love with it. I am not well versed with photography but I believe I do have an eye for whats good and most of what I've browsed through till now is just brilliant.You all should definitely check it out! :)

Of About Me-s and I

2007-04-06T22:28:00.000-05:00

An "about me" I came across while random blog hopping : "I am fun,smart and very very pretty". It made me smile.I have never been good with "about me-s"...I don't know why and so my blog doesn't have one.Perhaps there is too much and too little to me at the same time to be put into words.Perhaps secretly,somewhere deep down I do care about what random strangers(stumbling over my blog) would think or maybe its just that I've never really let go to be enough of me to know what actually is me. I thought about this a couple of days ago too, when an "about me" email chain was started by a fellow intern to-be in order to get to know each other a little(prior to being forced to work together..heh).I think I handled that one quite gracefully(read did not smack my head after hitting the send button) but I did wonder about how one would go about conveying their personality to total strangers over email without feeling awkward.And then,I thought about what would be worse;having to actually meet strangers and make conversation with them especially when there is absolutely no connection...with the current pathetic status of my "making small talk" skills,I'd take the email over this anyday!

The Sanjaya Anthem

2007-04-05T18:09:00.001-05:00

Comedian Eric Schwartz aka Smooth-E celebrates the magic of American Idol's SANJAYA!

I seriously think he should quit the show. I've even stopped feeling embaressed for him!

Why Aya shouldn't mess with Saad...

2007-04-01T12:09:00.000-05:00

Paperwork woes!

2007-03-26T11:54:00.000-05:00

Don't you hate filling out forms? I do.Its painful, it makes me nervous and did I say I hate it already? *sigh*
I recieved my contract and a tonne of other paperwork from the hospital the day before.I don't know why but I've always dreaded stuff like this. Out of all the people in the world, I should be totally conditioned for all this by now...I am and have always been the official paper work looker-up-per and form filler for my family for all sorts of stuff ;visas to passport renewals to you name it and not to forget my own licensing exams and residency applications....but the fact that I can already feel my hands go cold and the jitteriness set in suggests otherwise. So, here I am staring at this ominous looking large white envelope in front of me with all these forms.Come to think of it...how bad can it be? For example this one form should be real easy to get done with...I don't smoke,don't drink,no history of substance abuse or dependance, not bipolar or schizophrenic.Its a good thing they don't ask about OCD....cos right now I am pretty convinced I have an element of that..ha!Ohh and heres some more.....what days do I not want to be on call? during what months do I plan to take a vacation?what rotation schedule would I most want to have for myself...blech..You know why I am not liking this too much...because I just don't like thinking so far ahead...and I have to now..
Oh well,this needs to be done...new pictures need to be taken and everything needs to be mailed out in a few more days...joy!

Jeff Beck - Nadia

2007-03-24T18:26:00.001-05:00

The Whirling Dervish

2007-03-22T17:26:00.000-05:00

My Visual DNA

2007-03-20T22:52:00.000-05:00

I was about to turn in after posting about DP's step 2 when I found this "visual DNA" at Que sera sera's blog.I couldn't help but get one for myself as well.While I've never been a big fan of such tests or whatever you may call them....I must say this one was so much fun and mostly spot on for me!

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

DP's Step 2

2007-03-20T22:21:00.000-05:00

DP (DrPak) takes his USMLE Step 2 (CK) exam a couple of hours from now. I hope very much that it goes real well,inshaAllah and look forward to him getting down to blogging again soon.

Through A Child's Eyes

2007-03-19T15:04:00.000-05:00

From an email that O-C forwarded to me ; to the eternal child that I assume is alive deep down in all of you...enjoy!

March Madness

2007-03-17T22:14:00.000-05:00

The only sport I have ever followed is cricket. Sadly, my enthusiasm for it has waned ever since I moved to the US...blame the studying,our team not doing particularly well etc etc. I don't even know whats happening with the cricket World Cup other than the fact that our team sucks. Things may have been different had I been in Pakistan but oh well.Anyways, right now I probably have working knowledge of college football and that too by default, courtesy D. Quite unlike a (typical) Pakistani girl, she is a huge sports fan. What little I know of American football today is because of her...be it college football or pro...she'd be on top of what ever is happening. Its always fun watching games with her but honestly I'd rather watch Law and Order or House or Scrubs.So,I was actually quite relieved (much to D's dismay) when the football season ended last year.
I spent most of today morning doing grocery with my mother and when we got home in the afternoon, D was in her favourite spot in front of the tv.....right where we'd left her. Apparently its basketball season or watever now and its called March Madness. She stayed there watching game after game after game till a little while ago when I dragged her out! What was interesting was that she had this paper in her hand which she'd used to predict the outcomes of each game...yellow is where she'd been right and pink is where she'd been wrong. She and a few of her colleagues are all doing this and whoever makes the most right guesses wins twenty bucks. ESPN, supposedly is doing the same on a much bigger scale and they just found out too late about it and decided to play (?) between themselves. I find this quite interesting and amusing at the same time but I don't think I'd ever be so into it all ; D just thinks I am dead boring.

The Match - 2

2007-03-15T16:32:00.000-05:00

The match results are in and alhamdulillah I've matched at my top choice! :)
It all hasn't really sunk in as yet and hence the short blog entry....hehe...but thank you all for keeping tabs on me and all the support.Shall write more soon.

The Match

2007-03-13T06:43:00.000-05:00

I got to know part of my "Match" results yesterday ; I say "part of" because I am yet to find out where I have matched but the good news is that I have matched into a residency program somewhere,alhamdulillah.I find out about the "where" bit on the 15th of March and shall of course let you guys know. I called my father to let him know as soon as I found out and not too surprisingly he did what he has always done in situations like these. Over the course of these past two years of taking exams and the fact that I have spent lots more time at home ever since I graduated I came to realise now that after almost every exam he'd ask me what my "gut feeling" was about how I did(and now that I think of it this goes as far as I can remember). My answer(since the time I was fifteen) has always been the same : "I don't know and right now I really don't care" and usually thats the end of it all. Now this might make him seem like those pushy parents who are on their childrens' backs to do well...oddly...I've never felt that way...but I am totally amused by this "what's your gut feeling?" question which also happened to be the recurrent theme after all of my interviews and then when I was about to submit my rank order list. Anyways, I have never been much of a thinker (DP says thats a blessing...I think he's just happy that I can't bug him on account of that in addition to all the other things I bug him about)...yeah... so not being a thinker helps and keeps me sane...but every time my father pops the "gut feeling" question its like my self set equilibrium gets all topsy turvy. So, yesterday he popped the same question about what my gut feeling was as to where I'd end up.My answer : "I don't know and right now I really don't care". What was a little weird this time round was that instead of letting it go like he usually does...he asked me to tell him what my top three choices were again and even though I knew he was always the strongest advocate of the program close to home...the moment of silence that followed after I'd told him my choices again made me realise how much he'd love for me to match at that program (my numbers two and three are out of state programs). It was as if he was taking it all in and balancing out the entire me moving away bit with the protective fatherly instinct.It also made me feel bad for that impatience riddled reply and made me think about how at times we take our parents' love and affection for granted....so,I told him that I hoped very much to match at my number one but if it didn't happen that way it would be Allah's will and be for the best,inshaAllah. I hope this took some of his worry away at least...it probably did.
The match is quite unpredictable.I personally know of four people who didn't match and just knowing that somone who went through all this with you and got unlucky is terrible. I feel very blessed to have made it through.From the blogosphere ,both Usman and Uzer got matched. Unfortunately, Moiz didn't...which is very upsetting.The next two days is whats called the "post-match" or the "scramble" where people who have not matched try and get a spot at programs that have unfilled positions. I don't know whether Moiz is going through the scramble or not but we wish him the very best and will be praying that things work out well for him inshaAllah.

The American Idol Vote-Offs

2007-03-02T21:33:00.001-06:00

Since I have enough free time now to be investing five hours a week in watching American Idol, I thought it'd be ok to blog about this last vote off they had on the show (and alright...I admit I enjoy watching it and would do so even if I wasn't as jobless as I am these days). So these two guys were in the bottom two this week and one of them was to be voted off. The desi kid Sanjaya Malakar who is in the second video was pretty good during the auditions but he was nothing to write home about the week before and I thought he was terrible this week. Surprsingly, AJ Tabaldo who did ok the first week and did great this week (great song, sang well,awesome reviews by the judges) got voted off....the entire US desi population probably voted for the desi kid to keep him in the competition.He better pull off something great next week if he is to stay.

AJ Tabalado - Feeling Good

Sanjaya Malakar - Stepping out

The(long overdue)Update

2007-02-20T11:26:00.000-06:00

I and many others like me are about three weeks away from "The Match" ; thats when we find out if we have landed a residency spot and where.Here's a little prefeace if you may(from comments on a previous post) before I get into my long overdue update on all this.
"rai said...
so when do they tell you abt the results and all

5:10 PM
Aya said...
rai: They don't tell you.How it works is that you are picked out of the program applicant pool according to whatever their criteria is and are invited for an interview...you go and interview at those programs.Once you are done with all your interviews you prepare a rank order list...where you list the programs you interviewed at in order of your preference.Similarly the programs "rank" the applicants they interviewed and submit their lists.All this is apparently fed into a computer and the "Match" takes place around mid-March...simplifying it...if you liked a program and ranked it high on your list and that program liked you and ranked you high on their list too(btw it is illegal for a program to ask you about where exactly you will rank them and vice versa...so the programs and the applicants play this game of seding letters saying "we'll be ranking you highly" close to the match...and well you really can't take all this for granted)...you "match" with that program....did that make sense?

5:53 PM
rai said...
yeah..whole lot of beaureucracy to look important.inside their offices they probably toss coins to decide "

Beaureaucracy or not,and whether or not they are tossing coins to decide, the past couple of weeks have been riddled with indecision on my part as regards my rank order list. Would I rather end up at a relatively good program which is in the same city where my family is or rank those great out of state programs higher and live on my own provided I match there? While this may seem like a simple question to answer, it really wasn't the case.Adding to all this confusion were other things like the people at a particular place and whether I'd make a good "fit".All the conferring about this dilemma with my family and friends led to the same "Its upto you/whatever you think is best".It meant balancing out the career aspirations and opportunites Vs. proximity to family and home,the "fit", safety issues etc, etc,etc *sigh*
When I first started drafting my list of programs to apply to in September last year,I had restricted myself geographically to states that were closer to home. Its weird how what I thought would not be too far off then seems just that now!All said and done and no matter how brave a front I may put up, I came to realise that deep down for me, nothing tops having my family around me, especially during what would be a stressful three years. That said, it did hurt for a while to let go of places of great stature but I came to terms with all that and I finally made up my mind....my top pick is a program which is just a 25 minute drive away from home.The biggest advantage of matching at this program would be the fact that I'd be living at home and I intend on using the money thus saved in helping D out with financing her education.She works full-time and goes to school part-time. Reversing this equation has been at the top of my "(once I start making my own money!)to-do list".She could then work part-time and concentrate on getting her bachelors degree out of the way real soon, inshaAllah.Hopefully, it will all work out for the best.
Tomorrow would be the last day to certify and submit the rank order lists.No changes can be made after this and the wait for "match day" would begin.To fellow bloggers in for the match this year ; Moiz, Usman and Uzer...I'll be praying for you all and I hope very much that the match brings us all good news, inshaAllah.

Over The Rainbow

2007-02-04T21:24:00.000-06:00

A rather detailed up date is warranted here, which I shall get to in a day or two. I wrapped up the last of my interviews at the end of January and must now get down to finalizing my rank order list. I have a tentative list drafted but am still in two minds about a few things – more on that predicament later.

For the past few days, I’ve had this one particular tune from the Wizard of Oz just stuck there in my head. Its weird how this song has just popped up out of the blue…but its beautiful and warm…just what’s needed what with the temperatures dropping to sub-zero this coming week.

Over The Rainbow
(Arlen-Harburg)
Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true

Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?

p.s : O-C….this ones especially for the utopian in you... :)

Eid Mubarak!

2006-12-31T21:32:00.000-06:00

Hope you all have/had(depending on when it was celebrated at where ever you all are) a wonderful eid.May Allah bless you all with His choicest blessings!Ameen.

p.s:Que sera sera and Rai...I shall get those tags done...:)...I have just been extremely caught up with stuff(and partly lazy I admit)...will update soon inshaAllah.

Seven Things...

2006-12-16T19:31:00.000-06:00

The long over due tag by Writer's Creek.

Seven Things I want to do in life:
1) Become a practising muslim.
2) Go for Hajj with my family,inshaAllah.
3) Not forget what being a doctor is really about.
4) Become a great clinician-educator(a doctor who teaches as well;work in that capacity to reform medical education back home)
5) Learn Arabic.
6) Make Saad like me more than D(even if it means "buying" him into believing Aya is the bestest sister...of course that would be when I start making my own money and buy him stuff!)
7) Be content and be at peace with myself for the most part.

Seven Things I can do:
1) Cook
2) Sketch
3) Motivate people
4) Ride a bicycle.(I know people who can't and I think its actually a talent..heh)
5) Wrap gifts beautifully.
6) Drive my friends(and family) a little crazy with my worrying.
7) Kill a lizard.

Seven Things I can’t do:
1) Resist chocolate.
2) Make Saad realise I am not as mean and evil as he thinks I am.
3) Eat egg yolk.
4) Leave voice mails without thinking "I must've sounded like such a fool" afterwards.(which is why I don't end up leaving voice mails normally)
5) Pretend to be enthusiastic about something I am not really enthused with/about.
6) Talk a lot when travelling.
7) Dance.

Seven things I say the most:
1) Khair.
2) Please pray for me/remember to pray for me.
3) Alright/Ok.
4) Really?
5) You know.(at the end of a lot of my sentences!)
6) Nice to meet you/It was a pleasure meeting you...(as of now, at my interviews)..haha
7) Ummmm...

Seven Things that attract me to the opposite sex:
1) Intelligence
2) Religiousness
3) Patriotism
4) Humility
5) Honesty
6) Fortitude
7) Being well read

Seven Celebrity Crushes:
Too old for crushes(especially celebrity!) now...hmmmm...come to think of it I really haven't had any celebrity crushes(unless considering Jude Law good looking counts as a crush).

I tag:
DP(if he finds the time from his studying ofcourse)
O-C(if she finds the time from her globe trotting)
Rai
Beau
Sohnii
Que sera sera

Catching up

2006-12-16T17:54:00.000-06:00

I am behind on blogging again...by two interviews...oh well...here goes:

SIU:

I liked this program quite because I felt it was a place where I would get ample opportunity and encouragement to pursue my interest in academic medicine.The program director was wonderful...his slide show about the program more than made up for the not so impressive website.The program is one of the 17 programs across the US that have been selected to be part of the EIP. I was very impressed with the PD's interest in resident education .During my interview with him he told me in depth about the system of resident evaluation he had come up with...it was all extremely thorough and unique...he told me about how his scheme had actually made its way out to other programs who had also implemented the same(all the applicants get photocopies of the evaluation structure...apparently applicants had passed it on to other programs).I was also interviewed by the chief of rheumatology...that went quite well too.Its a smallish program...most of the residents are IMGs but there is a lot of diversity ranging from people from Romania,Ukraine,China,Pakistan,Sudan and India.Research isn't really a strong point for this program but there are opportunities available for those who are proactive about it.The interns who took us out for the pre-interview dinner were really nice.I asked them if they'd ranked SIU as number one in their rank order lists...and none of them had ranked it as number one...it was either number 2 or 3(I usually ask the residents what program they had ranked as number two provided the particular program they were at was indeed number one and then ask them about what was it about this program that made them choose it over the other)....so far this question has got me some candid answers and good insight into the program.Anyways,there were no major issues with this program per se that made the interns I talked to rank it lower than their top choice....just the fact that springfield is a small city and their isn't much to do there or they had family in another state far off from Illinois etc.Personally, I would be just fine if I had to live in Springfield...I don't really like big cities and Chicago and St. Louis are a 3 and a 2 hour drive away respectively if one needs to get away.I got a letter from the program director yesterday reiterating their strengths and that they would be ranking me highly and would be delighted to have me come in for a second visit.They probably sent the same letter to all the people they interviewed but it feels good all the same...:)

My interview at the Cook County Hospital in Chicago after this was quite an experience...(trivia...apparently, the county general hospital in the show ER is a factitious representation of this hospital)....more tomorrow(hopefully!).

For que sera sera

2006-12-11T18:21:00.000-06:00

A couple of my father's paintings:

The UK Interview (part 2)

2006-12-11T12:11:00.000-06:00

The rest of the day at UK after the one on one interviews pretty much flew by. Lunch with the residents was followed by a tour of the university hospital and the VA hospital.I couldn't help but wonder how easy it would be to get lost there especially with my adirectionia.
The greatest compliment to the program perhaps was the fact that the residents I met with on the clinical floors while touring the hospitals(so these weren't the "hand picked" residents who we had initially met with) said that they would definitely choose UK again if given a second opportunity.
I was very impressed with the program on the whole...it did offer the essentials I'd look for in a program.However,I must admit I didn't really feel like I connected...I am still finding it hard to put a finger on why exactly I felt this way because everyone I met with was friendly and warm.May be it was the fact that I didn't see any foreign grads there(they do say they have about 14 of them) or may be I am more of a small program person....guess I'll just sleep on this some more.
I've been lazy with posting about my interviews which really isn't good because its all pretty much a haze now and that kinda defeats the whole purpose of this exercise..hehe..but anyways...I interviewed at the Southern Illinois University this past Friday...more on that tomorrow.

The UK Interview (Part 1)

2006-12-02T18:43:00.000-06:00

My interview at University of Kentucky (UK) went fine, alhamdulillah. I had emailed the program administrator a few days before the interview to find out about the faculty that would be interviewing me…..I have this morbid fear of mispronouncing people’s names…anyways…I got the expected “I don’t know yet…you’ll find out the morning of the interview” reply. D and I drove down to Lexington…a nice and straight three and a half hour drive. The program had arranged for accommodations and we got to the hotel in the afternoon. The dinner with the residents the night before the interview was nice…all the candidates (there were five of us) were there along with two chief residents (and their spouses) and an intern. There were three IMGs including me and two AMGs…..the other two IMGs were from India and Jordan. The residents were all easy to get along with…and so were the rest of the candidates…although the guy from Jordan didn’t say much at all through out the dinner. I found out later that the poor guy had traveled over ten hours to get to Lexington. One of the AMGs was desi….I’ll call him the “talker”….he talked a LOT. When he first introduced himself to me I asked him where he was from originally….and he said… “Indian/Pakistani….take your pick”. So, call me weird or whatever but I just don’t like it at all when people say things like….”oh brown hair brown eyes…Indian/Pakistani…same thing”…..that just doesn’t go down well with me. Anyways I just smiled back and asked him where his parents were from…turns out they were from Pakistan…so he was Pakistani! Heres where I stop with my ranting and continue.
The interview day started at 8:00 a.m the next morning with the morning report which was well presented and very interesting. After that the PD gave a presentation about the program…which was mostly a rehashing of what was there on their website…and was boring. The PD somehow seemed a little distant but he did manage to get across all the progressive changes that had come about in the program over the past few years. From a little background reading that I had done on the PD I knew he was big on medical education and has quite a few research projects going on about how to effectively teach and evaluate residents during training. I had asked the residents I met the night before about the didactics at the program and they were all praise for their attendings in this regard. The emphasis on teaching is one of the things at the top of my list…that along with the fact that whether the residents have “full ownership” of their patients or not….because that is how one learns. I’ve heard people ask the question “do you get time to read?” from interns and residents…In my opinion, while that is important…but practically speaking I am sure there isn’t much time that one can read during their internship year….and even if there is…you’re so dead tired…you’d rather catch up on sleep…..which is where the entire “learning from the patients” comes in and the most effective way to do that is when you have ownership of your patients. I did see that at this program. Another thing that impressed me was what they called continuity clinics where the same faculty supervises the residents for almost their entire residency….this is a good thing too because every attending would have a different way of doing things…and well..if you have a different attending every other week…you’d not really be learning a whole lot but rather ending up learning each attending’s pet peeves. I ramble again!Back to the interview day…I had two 30 minute interviews with two faculty members. The PD did not interview me…I guess that’s how it works at the Uni based programs or does it?....may be the PD just interviews people who he thinks are real strong candidates. My interviews with the faculty went well….one of them asked the standard questions…Why medicine? Why internal medicine? Where do you see yourself in 5-10 years? Her and I connected when I told her that I wanted to eventually go into academic medicine and teach….She was doing a master’s degree in curriculum development and I really enjoyed the rest of our talk from there because it was more conversational then…until she popped the “how have you or would you handle a situation where you don’t agree with what a senior is telling you to do or is doing?” I think I managed to what DP would call “BS my way” through it…heh. The next interview was with this doctor from the allergy/immunology department. I knew he couldn’t really be bothered with the interview when the first question he asked me was “do you have any questions for me”…I hate it when they do that….somehow I feel it shifts the focus from you to the program and at the end of it all you leave feeling like they didn’t really get to know you any better as a person than what your application told them about you. He then went on to relate the strengths of the program and how he loved it there….it wasn’t all that bad….he did tell me about this formal research program they have at the university which no one had talked about through out the day….that was interesting.. I think the somewhat impersonal tone of this interview was part of the reason why I was a little queasy and unsure about how I felt about the program at the end of the day…and so the elaborate blog entry….I am hoping writing it all out will somewhat clear the fog in my head…..have to be off right now…the rest of the days story(and more of what I liked and did not like) tomorrow inshaAllah.

Post Interview 1

2006-11-28T17:34:00.000-06:00

My first interview went well, alhamdulillah. I think I mentioned earlier about the dinner the night before the interview…...it being right after thanksgiving only two candidates showed up(me and this one other guy) and it was just us and the chief resident. In a way it was good because it gave us a chance to get to know each other and for the chief resident to tell us about the program and answer our questions. The interview day itself started at seven and ended at one. I was the only international medical graduate amongst the 6 people interviewing that day…the rest were students from local universities in Michigan….a little intimidating as a couple of them had actually done a few rotations at this hospital and well, they seemed to know every one around. Anyways, two of them were really nice and it was fun talking to them as we awaited our turns for our respective interviews. I was interviewed by three people one of them was the chief resident ( yay ! Because he just told me he had gauged what he wanted to the night before and asked if I had any questions) The biggest selling point for this program would have to be the program director himself who went to great lengths to make one feel comfortable. I had liked this program instantly as I went through its website when I chose to apply to it. They are big on teaching, all the residents seemed happy, more than half their graduates go onto fellowship training and research is compulsory which helps a lot in fellowship placements down the line. The day ended with lunch with the residents. They also gave us these goody bags to take home..…brownie points there because they had a chocolate bar in them too! All in all, I must say it was a great experience…..I would probably have a better frame of reference as I interview at more places…but I did like what I saw at this particular program and for a community program it had some really impressive credentials. I am going to be in Detroit in January for another interview and I think I will probably go and visit this program again inshaAllah. I head out to Kentucky next….I am scheduled to interview at University of Kentucky on December 1st. It probably won’t be as laid back as my previous interview what with it being a university program(for the non medics…university programs are generally considered better than community programs and so their interviews are said to be more high profile too….I have my own reservations about this but I shall talk about that some other day). Its going to be quite a road trip as D and a cousin have decided to accompany me…..we’ll be driving down and it’ll be fun! After this I’ll have a week before my next interview which is just perfect timing because Maa is flying down from England to visit for exactly one week! I am very excited as this would be one time in the past two years when I’d be able to spend time with her without having to worry about some crappy exam! Thank you all for checking in on me…keep praying…Aya still has a long way to go! :)

2006-11-22T06:41:00.000-06:00

Ever wonder how defence mechanisms come into play time and again....well,I have and it has always fascinated me.There is suppression,denial,projection,dissociation etc etc...all(apparent)unconscious props to reduce inner conflict.I was thinking the other day about how there are times when one just thinks...."what will be will be" or the entire kismet and karma rigamarole and of course (my favourite) God's will.It just occured to me that perhaps all the aforementioned were all defence mechanisms after all....not a happy thought this...because it made me realise that often I have resorted to the God's will stance without truly believing in it.Anyways,enough moroseness....current defence mechanism in play = compartmentalisation....putting all this in a seperate box and moving on.
I have my first interview scheduled for the 27th of November in Michigan.There is an informal dinner with the residents the night before....something to worry about a little because Aya's scoial skills may just have atrophied somewhat what with being the home bound creature that I have been of late.I had been erratcially scanning through potential interview questions, trying to brain storm answers and the sheer dumbness of some(ok most!)of the questions amazes me but oh well....lets see what comes of this.The only thing I am sure is good with all this is the suit that I got.I had initially just randomly picked one up because I got frustrated with having to shop(I hate shopping!) and in the days to follow I realised I didn't like it one bit.So, I returned it and found a much nicer one...alhamdulillah.Anyways,thats all the excitement(not!)that there is....you all pray(extra hard if you will) for me and I shall keep updating on how the interview trail treats me....hmm...how about I be a little optimistic here...make that... how I treat the interview trail? :)

p.s: Just realised...need to get shoes..ughh!

The Fall

2006-11-16T13:55:00.000-06:00

Untitled

2006-11-07T13:32:00.000-06:00

Scene: Aya goes to pick Saad up from Sunday school at the mosque a little later than usual on account of the pizza party organised after school.

Conversation between Aya and six/seven year old kid(holding a slice of pizza...tomato sauce dripping down) at the mosque entrance.

Aya: Assalamoalikum!Are you guys done with the pizza party?

Kid(gives a blank stare...hides Pizza behind back): uhhh...yeah,its over.If you run you might just be able to get a couple of slices....they have some left inside.

Aya: errr...thanks.

Aya gets Saad and wonders about why in the world would "Kid" fear Aya to be a "pizza snatcher"!

Tagged(again) by Sohnii

2006-11-01T08:16:00.000-06:00

I am thinking about...how evil sohnii is to have tagged me...again!....but seriously...I was just thinking about how its November already and how this year has literally flown by.

I said..."Figure out where exactly you are taking the darn exam,woman!" to my best friend about five minutes ago.She takes an exam tomorrow morning and apparently has no clue where she needs to show up. (yes,I attribute part of my OCD to her nonchalance)

I should...go for a run soon.

I want to...get over being this lazy, good for nothing, jelly fish like creature that I've become of late!...hehe...ok, its not all THAT bad. Actually, I want to be able to teach at a medical school back home one day,inshaAllah.

I wish...my faith wasn't all that pendulumish and that I was more proactive in trying to make sure it remained at a more or less continous high ebb.

I miss...my dadi(gandmother),my sister Maa,my best friend,talking to this one other friend,Lahore...heck, I think I even miss my college!

I hear...chirping of the birds outside right now.

I wonder...if S(ok Saad) would ever love me as much as he loves D....hehe..(I know for a fact that he won't and yet I still wonder!)

I regret...hmmm...nothing as of now...alhamdulillah.

I am...me? ;)

I dance...umm..not.

I sing...I can't sing...and well...I don't!

I cry...quite easily,I think.

I am not always...optimistic.

I write...long e-mails filled with random ramblings.

I confuse...my spellings...is it recieve....or recEIve?hehe...also...people or pOEple?

I need...to have more confidence in myself.Oh and according to D I also need to be able to decipher if and when I am being taken for granted!

I should try...to be nicer to S and win him over!

I finish...what I start...most of the times.I don't like letting things hang in the middle.

Ok, this was hard!I tag anyone who wants to be tagged!...hehe..no pressure people!

2006-10-30T12:46:00.000-06:00

This needs more work but I am quite pleased with it all the same...:)

S's First Newspaper Article

2006-10-26T20:14:00.000-05:00

S is on the school newspaper and I came across this article on school lunches that he wrote for the upcoming issue.I think he's done a really good job and just had to put it up here because its so cute!

"
School Lunches
by S

Hi,I am S and I have interviewed 6th graders about their opinions about our school lunches and what they think should be added.
Overall, the school lunches have a great taste and are very healthy most of the time.The pizza is delicious.Its one of the best kinds I've ever had.Cheesy breadsticks are just a small step away from the pizza. There are many choices and different ypes of things to choose from every single day. The lines don't take too long to clear up and everyone cooperates to keep the line moving.I liek the times for lunches except sometimes since you only get twenty minutes and it cuts into our recess time especially for poeple like me who are slow eaters.If we had five more minutes, that'd be great.Other than that, I like how the schedule is set up and those who have lunches later on in the day can bring snacks in most classes. The drink choices are great,especially the orange juice.The there are seating arrangements whcih are great too except that I think we should be able to sit with the other team.This could help all 6th graders get to know people better and give a chance to make new friends.Finally, the lunch ladies are swift,fair and get the kids from the register to the table in no time flat.
Well, thats about it and if you are wondering what the favourite lunch of most 6th graders is....it is of course PIZZA!To wrap this up....the cafeteria is doing a wonderful job and they will continue doing this through out the year.
Goodbye!"

2006-10-26T20:08:00.000-05:00

The Banana Walnut Cake

2006-10-24T08:52:00.000-05:00

I had been putting off making this banana walnut cake for quite some time now....laziness,laziness! Well, I finally got down to it yesterday and mashaAllah it turned out amazing...if I may say so myself! :D
I am posting the recipe in case any of you want to give it a try...it really is the simplest thing ever and is such a quick fix too....30 minutes tops!

1+1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 large ripe bananas,mashed
1 egg
3/4 cup sugar
1/3 cup butter or margarine,melted
1/3 cup crushed walnuts(just cut the shelled walnuts into smaller pieces)
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon

TOPPING:
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 table spoon cold butter or margarine

In a large bowl combine the first four ingredients,the walnuts and the 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon.Combine the bananas,egg,sugar and butter in a seperate bowl;mix well.Stir into dry ingredients.Fill greased or paper-lined cake pan/baking dish three-fourths(the cake rises considerably so don't use too small a pan).Combine the first three topping ingredients;cut in butter until crumbly.Sprinkle over the batter in the pan.Preheat oven and bake at 375 degrees F(it'll be different for the degree C scale...I'll let you do the math) for 18-20 min.Cool in pan 10 minutes before removing to a wire rack and well...enjoy!

Eid Mubarak!

2006-10-23T13:42:00.000-05:00

Hope you all have a blessed eid!

Tagged by sohnii

2006-10-20T06:31:00.000-05:00

Today
Height: 5'6
Color: ummm...I just asked my sister what "color" I was...she told me to say "I am African American"..hehe...I'd say I have a wheatish complexion.
Piercing: Two in each ear.
Tattoos: none.

Right NowTime: 7:32 a.m
Mood: Pleasant...I am a morning person and am mostly happy in the mornings. :)
Taste: Had sehri over an hour ago...even the taste of mouthwash has worn off by now..so..nothing.
Weather: Cold,grey and cloudy (and I like that).
Bad habit: Incessant worrying...there are at least 10 things that I am worrying about right now...and my day has just begun... *sigh*
Current crush: Won't tell..:P..hehe...I am probably too old for all this now..hehe
Biggest regret: Never thought about this....hmmm...none as of now....I think!
Perfume(s): Just put on the hoodie I was wearing yesterday...so, right now I smell of Lacoste's Touch of Sun.
Thing I want to do: Get done with answering all these questions!

Favourite
TV show: Law and order,ER,House (and I've recently developed a liking for scrubs..and yes sohnii...JD is cute..:)..)
Book: There are so many that I like...but I could read The Magic Faraway Tree series(Enid Blyton) over and over. (oh and add to that...The Little Prince...I love this book too)
Non alcoholic drink: Not too much of a fizzy drink fan...but if I were to pick one...Diet Coke.
Milk drink: Hot Chocolate!
Brand: none
Color: Teal
Emblem: none
Perfume: Pleasures
Designer: No one in particular.
Chocolate: I love chocolate...all sorts...my favourite...something I can never pass up on would be the peanut M n Ms!

Have I Ever
Broken the law: No
Misused credit card: No
Skipped school: Sure I have...but not because I wanted to...I loved going to school.
Fell asleep in the shower/bath: No....I really don't know how people can fall asleep in the shower...
Had children: No
Been in love: No
Been hurt: Yep...plenty of times...if we're talking of being hurt emotionally.I get beat pretty regularly by my little brother S...so I can claim to have been physically hurt too..:)

RandomHave a job: No...not right now..hopefully that'll change soon!
My CD player has what in it right now: Haven't used a CD player in ages...I don't even know were mine is!
If I were a crayon, the color: Black
What makes me happy: The Rain!

When/What Was the Last
I got a real letter: Last year in December...pre step 1/a cousin wrote to me to cheer me up with an A-Z list of reasons why I needed to do well on the exam....many of which were really funny!
Got an email: 5 minutes ago/some random email about free calls to Pakistan
Thing I purchased: day before yesterday/gas for my car
TV program I watched: Last night/Law and Order-Criminal Intent
Movie I saw in the theaters: August 2006/Step up
Hugged: an hour ago/my sister
Place I was: an hour ago/My sister's room
Song heard: Yesterday morning/bulla kee jaana main kaun (Rabbi Shergill)
Phone call: Last night/Arsh
Was depressed: A little...last night after having talked to a friend who is not too happy with life right now.

What Comes to Mind When I Hear
Car: My adirectionia(no sense of direction)
Murder: The words "in cold blood"
Cape: Cape Cod
Cell: Phone
Fun: The candy/chocolate aisle! :D
Shoe: Need to get a pair
Crush: ok..this is nerdy..hehe.. but right now when I hear the word crush..the book "crush the boards" comes to mind...weird because I didn't even use it to prep for the boards!
Music: My father (he plays a whole bunch of instruments!)
Love: My mother
Chalk: 5th Grade(did you know there is such a thing as the black board monitor?)

Alright...who do I tag?O-C,Beau,Writer's creek...amongst the girlies.As for the guys...I am not sure if they have the patience to answer all this..hehe..but for the heck of it...I tag Rai and Usman and well DP isn't blogging so we'll spare him the honor..

Katrina (courtesy O-C)

2006-10-19T20:54:00.000-05:00

Sketch

2006-10-17T16:47:00.000-05:00

Some years ago I would probably have labelled drawing as a hobby....I'd like to believe I was good at it too.Well...in medical school my drawing was limited to drawing dissected body parts initially and then pathology slides and specimens...all part of course work.I don't know why I gave up on drawing otherwise during that time....but I did.A few days ago I just felt this urge to grab a pencil and a sketch book to try my hand at drawing again. I was quite disappointed because it just didn't seem to come as easy I had imagined it would....rightly so, because I have been out of practice for so long.Anyways,heres something I came up with today...its nothing great but its definitely a start.

:)

2006-10-13T19:26:00.000-05:00

I have some good news to share...I got my CS exam result today (this was the exam I took in Atlanta) and Alhamdulillah I have passed.I am delighted of course as this marks the end of the series of exams that I was required to take to be certified. This also means that I now get to add those two letters at the end of my name i.e M.D....which my mother says is the best part!
Its been quite a journey all this and I must single out and thank the few people who visited my blog and cheered me on.Rai,niqabi,sozzy and beau...thankyou all ever so much!Last but not least....DrPak deserves an extra special mention.He has just been terrific with all his support through out this entire time for he actually endured all my whining in real time over MSN and google talk.Thankyou DP!
Of course, this doesn't mean that you all are off the hook...I am on the trail to residency now and well...the whiner in me ain't done yet! ;)

hmmphh!!!

2006-10-13T10:25:00.000-05:00

D's computer has been infested by viruses.Actually,I can comfortable call it MY computer because it has sooo much of my gunk on it that it technically is mine!Anyways...back to the virus infestation....It all started the day before yesterday when there was a sudden crazy onslaught of absolutely ridiculous pop-ups from God knows where. Turned out the Norton antivirus had expired and I hadn't paid any heed to the renewal recommendations that had been popping up for a few days now. So, I got the subscription renewed for sixty bucks only to realise that the damn viruses had taken over complete control of the computer...such that I couldn't even install the new Norton antivirus.I called the customer support services who told em that I'd have to pay seventy bucks for and their analysts to help me. I got the antivirus thing up and running finally.However,that was surely not the end of it. The pop-ups still kept showing up everytime I opened my internet browser. I called the customer support again yesterday morning and well....I spent almost the whole day trying to get it fixed....*sigh*...and its still no where close to being fixed. A hundred and thirty bucks and a day and half of being told to "hold on please" and "thankyou for your patience".....ITS STILL NOT FIXED!Heres what I think these antivirus software people do....they wait...wait for your subscription to expire and then send in these rapidly replicating viruses themselves to your computer.What do you do? Ofcourse you get scared and renew your subscription...but by then its too late.Then you call them to ask for help and surely they want you to "have your visa or master card ready to pay for the service".Alright...so you pay some more hoping that NOW they'll be able to fix it.Thats where you're mistaken....what starts now is a vicious cycle of them putting you on hold(for ages) and then getting you through to analyst upon analyst upon analyst till you yourself get sick of calling them and just let it be!Ok...I need to go now because the current "analyst" who had put me on hold has decided to come back to life.

p.s: In case someone's wondering how I am bloggin if my computer is messed up...I've borrowed my father's laptop just to whine here.

The "feel good" Cloud Pictures!

2006-10-10T08:06:00.000-05:00

Took these on the plane on my way back from Pakistan this April.

B o r e d

2006-10-06T08:39:00.000-05:00

Ah yes....I’ve been away again! Well…not really…I’ve been here but just didn’t feel like blogging….attribute that to laziness, lack of muse (not that any of my posts fall into the category of creative writing… hehe ) whatever. Anyways, I sent in my residency applications a few days ago and to my surprise I got an interview call yesterday. I am happy of course because I didn’t expect any so soon after applying. Hopefully, things will pan out well and I’ll land some more interviews soon. Getting my applications together kept me busy till a few days back but with those out of the way now, I must admit I am bored. I should probably come up with a countering boredom “to do” list. Just off the top of my head:

Make that long overdue trip to the library and get some books to read.
Take pictures of the trees en-route to and around my aunt’s neighborhood….they’re absolutely gorgeous come fall. (I’ll put them up here if they turn out nice)
Err…charge the camera to take those pictures. :D
Volunteer to help set up the new library at the school where my mother works.
Oh and a friend asked me to try writing a sonnet…so, add “try writing a sonnet”.

Not bad eh? Additions to this so called list are welcome of course.

p.s: I don’t watch much TV…so that doesn’t count.

Back

2006-09-21T10:02:00.000-05:00

I guess this hiatus from blogging has to take the prize…it really has been quite a while. Its funny but now that I don’t have any exams to study for (for the time being at least) I actually don’t know what to do with myself! What have I been up to all this time? Nothing much but I’ve had fun. A cousin was visiting from England a few weeks ago and D and I took her to King’s Island. Now this theme park of course isn’t as big as six flags but is great fun nonetheless. I think I may have become somewhat of a chicken over the years. I was secretly relieved that the two of them refused to sit on this massive wooden roller coaster that I had initially planned on getting on! I have this thing with actually graduating to bigger rides every time we go to such parks….so I begin with simpler rides…I call them baby rides…and then move to the higher thrill ones. Anyways, I pride myself on being able to get on the ones that I did! Other than this, I have picked up this fascination for biking. D and I found this nice trail not to far from where we live. I love going there especially early in the morning when its still foggy. Its so much fun biking through all the fog as it precipitates on your face like cool mist! The weather has been simply amazing…yes! the skies have been grey and cloudy and its been raining…and I guess I’ll leave it at that…I really don’t want to get started on the rain yet again! I am hoping I’ll be more regular in posting here…I didn’t realize till now that I actually missed it!

DrPak's D-day

2006-08-29T22:58:00.000-05:00

DrPak and his fiancé take their USMLE step 1 exam right about now. I hope and pray that it goes well for both of them and that all their hard work pays off (insha’Allah).

On Being a Doctor

2006-08-26T08:56:00.000-05:00

"As you learn to become a doctor, there is a frequent sense of surprise, a feeling that you are not entitled to the kind of intrusion you are allowed into patients' lives. Without arguing, they permit you to examine them; it is impossible to imagine, when you do your very first physical exam, that someday you will walk in calmly and tell a man your grandfather's age to undress, and then examine him without thinking about it twice. You get used to it all, but every so often you find yourself marveling at the access you are allowed, at the way you are learning from their bodies, the stories, the lives and deaths of perfect strangers. They give up their privacy in exchange for some hope - sometimes strong, sometimes faint - of the alleviation of pain, the curing of disease. And gradually, with medical training, that feeling of amazement, that feeling that you are not entitled, scars over. You begin to identify more thoroughly with the medical profession - of course you are entitled to see everything and know everything; you're a doctor, aren't you? And as you accept this as your right, you move further from your patients, even as you penetrate more meticulously and more confidently into their lives." - Perri Klass, M.D.

Updates

2006-08-20T17:34:00.000-05:00

Its been a while since my last post. I took my clinical skills(CS) exam in Atlanta the day before yesterday. In all there were twelve standardized patients to be seen with each encounter lasting 15 minutes…..where you had to take the history and do a quick physical exam and then counsel the patient. You are then required to write a patient note with the pertinent details, the possible diagnoses and workup for each in 10 minutes. I messed up on my first encounter where I ran out of time! After that I made it a point to be quick in my questioning. There are sooo many things that I can recall now that I missed but hopefully there is allowance for those given the time constraints. The good thing is that this one is a pass/fail exam and so the stress of scoring high does not come into play. I won’t have the results for this exam till October(stress…more stress!!)….which means I will be applying for residency with just my step 1 and step 2 CK scores in hand. I got back from Atlanta yesterday to find my CK score (the exam I whined about till the end of July remember?) awaiting me. I scored a 91/224 which to be honest is a disappointment because I was gunning for a higher score on this as the practice exams I took had predicted considerably higher scores too. I really don’t mean to sound like an ingrate but this was one of those very rare occasions in life where I did let my hopes get a little high…..even after having found the exam hard. That said….I am not depressed and am not hanging on to it either. I am really thankful to God for having brought me this far and its time to move on. It’s been hard having to study day in and day out for more than a year and a half and I am glad it has finally drawn to an end. I must now complete my residency application. There is lots of work to be done in that department. I have yet to work on my personal statement and get a couple of letters of recommendation from back home. The problem here is that the professors at my medical college have delegated the non-enviable task of writing MY letters of recommendation to……ME! So, imagine my plight….how do I write about four such letters…make them sound different and then write my personal statement too making sure it doesn’t sound the same as those letters….did that make sense? As of now Aya is brain dead! I have not even an ounce of creativity left in me…what little I had went down the drain when I joined medical college!I will keep updating on this exciting aspect of my life…..meanwhile keep praying for me(especially my CS exam results….I cannot afford to fail that!) and those who did pray for me....I thankyou all!

Aya's B'day Cake!

2006-07-31T20:54:00.000-05:00

I loved the cake my mother got me....now, can a cake get any prettier?! :)

p.s: Did ayone turn twenty-five and didn't feel like they actually did turn twenty-five?

Done!

2006-07-30T15:35:00.000-05:00

Got done with the exam day before yesterday. I think it went ok but it was tough...lots of questions where I was like “what in the world are they talking about?”. I am just glad its over. Keeping my fingers crossed now and hoping for the best…results in about three weeks(which means you all have got to keep praying!)!
I am scheduled to take step 2 CS in two weeks. For the non medics…this one is a test of clinical skills with encounters with simulated patients(so basically its all pretend). I have taken these past two days off and will start studying for CS from tomorrow….(how exciting!…is anyone getting sick of hearing about all these exams and the studying yet?).

D-day

2006-07-17T19:49:00.000-05:00

I take the USMLE step 2 ten days from today,inshallah.Its an 8 hour long exam with an hour of break time and so not only tests clinical knowledge but is also a test of stamina.I am doing ok so far but every day is a fight....its hard not to feel low or have self doubts and this has to be my greatest weakness.Its not just the exam but also the fact that a lot hinges on how I do on this.I went through a terrible pre-exam phase last December when I took step 1....its not that bad this time but the uncertainity is still there.To the few who visit my blog regularly...your prayers are needed and will be much appreciated.

Tagged

2006-07-09T19:08:00.000-05:00

I’ve been tagged by Beautiful Stranger to take a test to measure how gross I am. Here are my results….you wouldn’t mind me being your doc with that level of grossness (is that even a word?)…would you now?

12% gross
>“You’re not gross, but you tend to think everyone else is. And you’re right… they are!Some people may think you’re a neat freak, but at least you’ll never die of flesh eating bacteria.”
Since Rai hasn’t posted in a while…I tag Rai!

blueness personified

2006-06-21T21:36:00.000-05:00

Now that I am done with the whole kleptomania story(scroll down),here's some whining coming your way.Things have been quite a mess here at my end.There were some family issues which I was managing to block out but you know how they say "when it rains, it pours"....well it did pour. I have been stressed about those family issues...stressed about my studies which went down the drain and if that wasn't enough little S accidentally threw away a precious notebook of mine which had a LOT of material that I needed to prepare for the exam.I don't know if I am getting the magnitude of this situation across right.I had worked so hard in making all those notes...spent hours listening to lectures...transcribing them,looking up extra information and adding it all in just so my life would be easier close to the exam...and it just gets thrown into the garbage!I hate to admit it but its sort of my fault...I shoudn't have left that notebook on S's study table.Oh well...whats done is done....but I have been depressed like anything. I am having to literally dig myself out of this depression. I think its just too many things hapening all at once.....or may be I am just not as tough as I'd like to think I am.I cried so much that day...I seriously felt robbed!
I am trying to bring some form of order to life and the studying now. I went to the library today for a few hours and came back because it was too cold...yes, I had a sweat shirt on...and yes, people were staring at me like I was crazy...but it was still too cold.Tomorrow,I am taking the thickest sweat shirt I own and some hot chocolate just so I can sit there and make up for the lost studying time.I don't think I'll be posting in for a while after this...hmmm...I just might if I feel extra whiny and want you all to go endure the torture....so keep checking in on me..:)...and prayyyyyyyyy!!

Kleptomania (?) ctd.....

2006-06-21T21:21:00.000-05:00

V called T the next day. T was in Islamabad . Then, V asked her if she had heard anything new about my bag. T said she hadn’t and explained how she had looked for it everywhere that day too. V listened to her go on for a while and then interrupted her. She told T that it was really weird but someone had come up to us and told us that it was her who had taken the bag.T asked her who had said it and how can we be so sure. V decided to call her bluff. She told T that we know for sure because that person saw her leave with my bag from the museum.There was silence at T’s end . V felt encouraged and went on saying that the dean at the college had told us to report the matter to the police. This did the trick. T suddenly blurted out an apology and confessed to taking my bag!! She now wanted to know what we wanted her to do. V told her that I wanted my bag back. She said she’d come back to Lahore the next day and meet us at the college. I was very relieved.

V and I went to meet T at the college the next day. We saw her standing in the parking lot and went up to her. I didn’t see her holding my bag! I thought maybe she had it in her car or something. I was wrong. I asked her where my bag was and she said that she didn’t have it! She said after she’d taken it, she got scared and she threw it in one of the labs upstairs. I felt like killing her for not telling us about this the day before! She said she thought one of the lab attendants may have picked it up. V didn’t agree with this because we had gone upstairs within ten minutes of realizing that the bag was missing to check the labs. We had told all the lab attendants to be on the look out too. I didn’t know whether to trust T anymore.

T said she wanted to look for the bag in the labs once more….which was plain stupid because if she had indeed thrown it there it really wouldn’t be sitting there waiting for us to find it! I told her she was pushing my buttons now and that she should honestly let me know what she’d done with my stuff. She, then took out a cell phone from her bag and handed it over to me. Apparently, she had stolen that cell phone from another girl the day before she took my bag. She said if she had my bag with her she would have brought it just like she brought that girl’s cell phone. I was really confused…I had no idea what to do. T was willing to pay me for the damage done but begged me not to tell anyone about this. I wasn’t going to do that… I told her I won’t advertise this to the rest of our class but I had to let the dean know about it because we had reported the matter to him. It would be his decision then.

I still wasn’t sure about whether I should take the money for my stuff from T. I wanted her to pay but not with the precondition of me forgiving her and forgetting all about it. The matter had to be reported to the college authorities. What bothered me the most was that she seemed so unperturbed….it almost seemed as if paying what was a considerable amount of money was no big deal to her. V and I were deliberating over this when she interrupted us saying that she had lots of family issues and needed psychiatric help. She then went on to say how she had been to a couple of psychiatrists before and they had all…check this…sexually harassed her!!! She said she was willing to get help this time round only if V and I went with her. We weren’t surprised when she brought this up because A (the girl who had originally suspected her) had told us how she had concocted such stories when she was caught stealing from her room. We told her that even if she was telling the truth about all this.....she had lost all credibility and it just wasn’t possible for us to believe her. She needed to get her family involved if this had really happened to her.

I decided on asking her to pay me back for my cell phone, stethoscope and torch. We took her to the respective shops to check on the prices and get an estimate. These were all expensive things and amounted to over 25,000 rupees. T ended up paying me 15,000 rupees because I decided on settling for a cheaper cell phone model than the one that was stolen. The stethoscope I had was too state of the art and so I ended up getting a simpler cheaper version for that too. Of course I got the same torch that I had because that was the absolute best. I sincerely hoped this would shame T into never stealing again. I met with the dean and told him about everything. He said he would set up a meeting with T and decide what to do with her now. T wasn’t kicked out of college. She was given a warning and all the hostel wardens were notified about this. About 3 months after this incident I got my national I.d card back in the mail. It had been in my wallet and someone had probably dropped it in a post box. I remembered telling T that whoever took it should at least have the decency to return my I.ds. I didn’t confront T about this because it would have been an exercise in futility. Since we were in the same class and I still had a year left, I ran into her often. We didn’t talk but what struck me as odd was that she would look me straight in the eye….it was always a cold ,stony look with no remorse whatsoever.

Every time I read about kleptomania, I am forced to think about T. Her defense was that she had kleptomania and I think that amongst her promises of never to do it again saved her from being kicked out of college. A couple of my close friends who knew about this thought the dean shouldn’t have let her go like that….they said she didn’t deserve to become a doctor. I think she may have changed for the better…at least I hope she did.

Kleptomania (?)

2006-06-10T19:50:00.000-05:00

I’ve been reviewing Psychiatry these past three days and have come to the realization that  it just depresses me. I don’t know what it is about the subject but it happens every time I go through it. Thankfully, I am almost done with it and am not so miserable any more. I was reading through kleptomania which is an impulse control disorder. People with this disorder steal things which are really of no use to them….be it for personal use or for monetary gain. This reminded me of an incident back at college. I was in my fourth year at that time and it was right before our mock exams. My batch of about  twenty five students had gathered in the pathology department’s basement where the museum was. We were all busy looking at specimens….making sure we knew how to identify each one because this was to be the last time we’d get to see them. After this they were to be sealed and kept safe (as if anyone was going to steal them!) till our finals.

There were set days on which each batch was to come and look at the slides and the specimens. I heard a couple of girls complain out loud about people from other batches coming in on “our” day….they did have a point because it was extremely stuffy with just the twenty five of us. Also, it was July and the sweltering heat made people even more intolerant. I wanted to leave as soon as I could because all the noise and the stuffiness was getting to me but there was still quite a few specimens that I needed to look at. It was then that the electricity went out! There was more complaining and groaning . I heard V call out to me. Some one had a torch with them and a group was huddled over the specimens in the dark. It was obviously a lost cause to make way into them and actually get to see something but I went over anyways. Much to my relief, the electricity came back on in about twenty minutes. V and I hurriedly looked over the remaining specimens and were all set to leave when I realized my bag wasn’t where I had left it! I looked around on the other chairs, under the table to no avail. I asked people around me but no one had seen anything because there had been no electricity.

I was flabbergasted. My bag had my cell phone, my check book, my wallet with about 3000 rupees and all my i.d cards, an expensive and much cherished stethoscope and torch light, amongst other things. I looked every where in the museum and even checked the laboratories upstairs.....but didn’t find it! I resigned myself to the thought that someone had stolen it. But I was frustrated because whoever it was, had to be one of my class fellows who were there in the museum at that time. Almost all of them were well known to me and I was good friends with them. V and I decided to leave then and probably report the matter to the head of the department …not that it would have made a difference. We were just about to leave when a girl A came to us. She said she might have a hunch as to who may have stolen my bag. She named a girl T who she claimed had stolen things from her room in the hostel .A however said that T had been dealt with  firmly by the hostel authorites but had begged to keep it all hushed. I was shocked because I had been with T in the same batch through the first two years and got along great with her. Our batches changed when we got to third year. She was one of the few people who were there out of turn on that day. I was confused. Then V suggested that we go and look for her and just ask her if  she has seen my bag. She thought we just may be able to judge if she had taken my bag by her facial expressions. We went upstairs and found her sitting on one of the benches in the corridor. I went up to her told her how I couldn’t find my bag. She asked me what I had in the bag  and said that she even looked for it herself in the labs once she heard about it. She kept a straight face through all this. We really had no evidence on the basis of which we could blame her other than that other girl A’s suspicion. "A" had also told us that "T" had claimed that she was just really upset because of family problems and would never do soemthing like this again A had forgiven her and had thought T had turned a new leaf .

V  took me back to her house. We tried calling on my cell phone but it had been switched off. I was worried because that was the only way by which my parents could reach me. I just sulked the whole day. “A” called me at V’s house and asked if we came up with something or not. When I told her I hadn’t she insisted on how she really thought it was “T”. She had asked a few more girls in the hostel about “ T” and there were two more people who had suspected her when things started disappearing from their rooms but didn’t have any concrete evidence against her. I decided to let it go and got down to calling my parents to let them know about all this. V wasn’t giving up on this though. She had a strong feeling that it was "T" and told me she was going to give her a call. More on this later.

Another Note to Self

2006-06-08T20:32:00.000-05:00

What you feel subjectively is not important…what’s important is that you make progress everyday.

Rain!

2006-06-07T18:06:00.000-05:00

I think this is probably my umpteenth post about how I love it when it rains…but I so do and I love to blog about it too (that kinda rhymed, didn’t it?)!I had the blinds to my window down and my study lamp on because… well….I like to pretend its all nice and cloudy outside on especially sunny days (like today). So ,I hear this rumble of thunder and am all smiles…I pull up the blinds and the sky is a gorgeous gray….. It continues to darken and then there is a flash of lightning, more thunder and glorious, glorious rain! :)

vitamins + water = all you need

2006-06-05T17:58:00.000-05:00

From the label on a bottle of this fancy nutrient enhanced water called “vitamin water”.

“focus : kiwi-strawberry (a+lutein)

now that everyone is glued to their cell phones ,no one really pays attention to what’s going on around them. With all that walking and talking, you never know what you could be missing: birds chirping, flowers blooming, shoe sales, really good-looking people, celebrities without make-up, telephone poles ,or piles of poo (and we don’t mean Winnie) that’s why this stuff has vitamin a and lutein to give you all the focus you need. So, keep your eyes peeled or that smell could be your shoe.”

I don’t know if its me sick of studying or whatever but this has amused me enough to not only blog about it but also to save the label!!!

S's Graduation

2006-06-01T19:10:00.000-05:00

It was S's fifth grade recognition day today....somewhat of a graduation ceremony for promotion from elementary school to middle school.He looked so cute!He's the one in the blue shirt and the khakis...the only boy amongst all the GIRLS in the second row ...ha ha ha!!

2006-05-30T15:33:00.000-05:00

It has been so hot here these past few days!The room where I study is more like an oven...even with the AC on!Its probably because it faces the sun directly and also because I have the computer on the whole day.I have had to shut the window which was my source of O2 and my excuse to not wanting to "go out into the open and get some oxygen!"(my mother's pet phrase nowadays).I had been irregular with my running for about four days and I felt very irritable the day before.So,I decided to go downstairs and run.Half an hour later I came back all smug for having done 2 miles in 30 minutes...only to have the worst knee pain ever later in the evening!!I gave my poor knee some rest yesterday and today I came back to my humble 1.25 miles.....happy to report that the knee is just fine!I've been deliberating over going for a run outside...there is a mile long stretch of a road that leads to our neighbourhood....but its too hot and I am too lazy...so I'll stick to the treadmill.Running can do wonders for me really...something that a simple walk just won't do.So,I really need to keep this up.Studying is coming along alright.The latest is that I have decided to postpone my exam to July 10th.I felt awful for moving it for a while but I am glad that I did.This would give me time to make those correlations and connections which I would otherwise have struggled to make for lack of time had I taken the exam as planned.I am making good progress now and it feels good to feel more on top of things.I guess this also saves you all from considerable amounts of whining...albeit temporarily!
Poor D is having a tough time at work.She is sick of working in retail and having to please people the whole day.To top all this,one of her co-workers(whom she had actually recommended for the job) disregarded all form of work ethic and told her last week that he has taken up another job offer....this without any two week notice!
I hope she finds someone to replace him.I have also told her to look for another less demanding job.Lets see how that all works out.Well,thats all for now.I still need you all to pray for me...so keep praying!

How would you spend a million dollars?

2006-05-26T17:57:00.000-05:00

That’s the math project that S is currently working on. He has been keeping very busy these days and I only found out about the details to this project yesterday. There is research to be done and actual accounting sheets to be filled out for however each kid decides to spend his/her million dollars. The money should however be spent on carrying out one particular plan. S has decided to buy a house for himself and furnish it. He had wanted to get a house he liked in Beverly Hills but it cost $900,000!He is now on the lookout for a new house which should preferably have a swimming pool….I find it funny because he has always been too scared and doesn’t even know how to swim!. I saw one of his itemized accounting sheets labelled “Electronics”. First on the list is an X-Box 360 followed by a couple of X-Men and football games for it. There is also a home theatre system complete with a multi media projector! I am looking forward to seeing how it turns out. This should be interesting. Frankly ,I don’t know what I’d do…. Perhaps make a lucrative investement and then buy a hospital and hire doctors to work for me without worrying about about being hired myself!! Now that’s a thought! How would you spend a million dollars?

On Confrontations.

2006-05-23T18:16:00.000-05:00

I have never liked confrontations. Fortunately, I haven’t been a part of too many and it’s a good thing too, because I am not good at handling things like this. I really don’t see the point to such arguments….I mean how many people do you come across who would give in because they truly believe they were wrong? Its more of a give in with a “I am the victim here” or “they’d never understand” thing . I have heard people say how its better to bring things out in the open and sort it out but I have yet to see it “sorted out”. If anything, I’ve seen things go from bad to worse and people who might have once cared about one another, get hurt and lose respect. Its hard (I’d even go as far as saying its impossible) to re-establish the same rapport then and ofcourse each party/person is wary of the other in the future. For now, I am for just letting go….to forgive if you can, and forget… because it makes life easier. I know this sounds utopic at best and that this approach would probably not work too well in the “real world”. I guess I have a lot to experience and learn.

Another Birthday!

2006-05-15T19:26:00.000-05:00

Its DrPak's birthday tomorrow.This month has been quite full for me birthdays wise(five to be exact!).I don't know any more people who are born in May...so with this one birthday it will be a wrap...whew!
Have a good one DP!I hope this year is fabulous for you and brings you much joy and happiness(especially that attributable to that much coveted 260!)!

D's Birthday

2006-05-14T20:17:00.000-05:00

It was my little D's birthday today.We had planned to take the grill out and have a Bar-B-Q out in the backyard, but it was raining so that didn't happen.I had also planned on getting her this amazingly delicious chocaholic chunk chocolate cake.However,D walked in on Friday evening ,with balloons and a cake!Apparently her boss had got her two cakes...one for people at work and one for her to take home...so that didn't happen either.So,while she was asleep in the morning I went and got her this balloon (which, by the way, took a real long time to find) and a box of assorted muffins(chocolate,blueberry and banana-walnut).She liked them a lot!!

Maa

2006-05-12T23:31:00.000-05:00

The most regular visitor of my blog.
The most fun-loving person I know.
Whose room would never in this lifetime be a mess.
Who would classify shopping as an art.
My most prized and appreciated fashion critique.
The one with the brightest smile and a contagious laughter.
The one who kept my room and closet in order (I can never do it the way you did!).
The “ really pretty one”. ; )
Whose “You can do it Aya!” I treasure.
Whose inner strength I envy.
The sister who “S” hates as much as he hates me!(I think he hates me more!) ;)
The sister who now lives in England and is missed so very much.

Happy B'day Mama!

2006-05-12T18:43:00.000-05:00

Enjoy looking at the cake we got for our mother.Layers of vanilla icecream and fudge....mmmm....tasted oh so good!

Note to Self

2006-05-12T11:19:00.000-05:00

Setting up goals and targets is what you do to keep yourself on track. If you don’t meet your goal for the day even when you gave it your very best, its only prudent to not to let it dampen your spirits. Stop whining(especially inwardly) about it…its depressing!
Run every other day if not every day.

The Evil Plan

2006-05-09T16:51:00.000-05:00

Studying is coming along alright. I feel better and non-whiny. Although ,I could so do with some more time for the exam. If only V’s wedding hadn’t been smack in the middle of all this. If only I had not gone to Pakistan. If only June wasn’t the very last month that I could take my exam in. Hmmmm… I am rambling! You know what though….I have the perfect plan to get back at V …when I get married, I am going to make sure it is at a time when she is eight months pregnant! And it will be somewhere where she’d have to travel a day and half to get to! I am evil…I know! ;)

2006-05-05T14:42:00.000-05:00

I have never been great at handling pre-exam jitters. I was quite a nervous wreck close to step 1 in December last year and had vowed not to let the same happen come time for step 2. Well, Step 2 is around the corner and I am afraid the same uncomfortable nervousness is slowly creeping back in. Its particularly bad when I start my day but gets better towards the end…..probably because I am too tired to be bothered by then. One thing that worked for me before was running first thing in the morning….I tried that yesterday and was all fired up but then towards mid-day I just felt very low….its this sort of mood/morale fluctuation that’s been bothering me and it is quite an uphill task to bounce back from it .Feeling quite frustrated, I chalked out a new study plan and following that has been of help in making me feel more on top of things. Today, has been pretty good so far and I feel much at ease….if only everyday from now on till June 20th is the same!I have actually been tempted to move this exam forward but thats out of the question because I have another exam(step 2 CS) scheduled for July 12th and I need to get these two exams out of the way if I am to make the 2007 match.I, so need all of you to start praying for me...pronto!!

Torrents

2006-05-01T16:01:00.000-05:00

Laughter is the best medicine….it is also a great stress reliever,provided its the kind of laughter I am referring to…the kind that makes your eyes water and your stomach hurt! DrPak had recommended Russell Peters to me a few days ago. He told me how to go about downloading his acts. I tried, but failed. So, today he introduced me to “torrents” and helped me set it all up .I must admit I am still unsure about what they really are and how they work but I find the name "torrents" quite fascinating. I managed to download a 45 minute clip of one of Russell Peters’ shows . It had me in fits! I don’t think I have ever laughed this much and yes!…it made my eyes water and my stomach hurt! I have been a bit stressed out these past few days and I feel so much better. I am being a bit of a miser and am watching it piece-meal because I want to “save” it till I have more.
I am looking forward to downloading more of his stuff. This could very well prove to be an incentive to study consistently through the day. I am excited!

Whiny Post(read at own risk)

2006-04-29T17:40:00.000-05:00

Today isn’t proving to be a good study day at all. Weekends always leave me unsettled and I almost wish there were no weekends….now all you people who have jobs and are gasping out loud at this statement….I am warranted in making this wish… at least till I get somewhere with this residency trail…of course I’d join your gang once I do! Its just that everyone is at home and I get distracted. I could go to the library but its too much work and its too cold for me there. Anyways…horrible day today. It actually started yesterday evening when D and I took S to watch a movie. To make a long story short….D’s car battery somehow went dead leaving us trying to get into the car only to have the car alarm go bonkers after every 10 minutes. So, our father had to come get us and we got back home at 12:00 p.m…I couldn’t go to sleep until after 1:00 a.m. and woke up all groggy at 8:00 a.m. this morning. I have had a splitting headache for which I should have taken medicine (which I am realizing as I write!!!...I can’t believe it didn’t occur to me when I had the headache!!!!!!).
D was working today and when she got back we ordered pizza but I managed to fight back my other “craving”….which was giving up on studying altogether and being a vegetable. I started studying....trudging along and then the pizza worked its magic and I felt oh so sleepy!! I didn’t fight that of course. So, I have just woken up after having slept for over an hour. I am not used to sleeping in the afternoons. It makes me all cranky .I still don’t feel all that great but at least it isn’t as bad as the morning and the afternoon. Hopefully, I’ll work later into the night than I normally do today and have some damage control…my exam is a month and twenty days away...*gulp*... I think I’ll start a count down of sorts but that would probably freak me out too much and prove to be counter-productive....so scratch that idea!

Untitled

2006-04-28T18:14:00.000-05:00

Aya: S,Will you pray for Aya?

S: Play for Aya…sure!.I’d love to!

Aya: No S…Pray not Play.

S: Ahhh….PLAYYY!!Sure thing Aya…I’ll PLAY my xylophone for you. Infact, I’ll play right here…in your room…its sooo roomy!

Aya: Stop annoying me S!

S: But that’s my job! *smirk*

S brings xylophone in…Aya gathers books to leave room.

S: Heyy!Stayy…it will be like background music!

Aya leaves room.

It rained today and

2006-04-25T20:12:00.000-05:00

It rained today and it has left a chill in the air…the kind that makes your hands go cold and tingles when you take a deep breath in but its not “cold” cold…if you know what I mean. The weather has been quite nice these past few days and I have had my bedroom window open. There is a tree that it overlooks and its funny how I had never really noticed it until today. I don’t know what kind of tree it is but its in full bloom and has the most gorgeous white flowers. They are small flowers that are growing in bunches and have just the right amount of pink in them…tiny specks right in the center. I had the most wonderful time just sitting by my window looking at the tree sway….it felt great!...and the fact that I got (kind of) scolded by my mother for leaving the window open and getting the window sill wet and the carpet soaked by the rain…well thats a seperate story….

Rai's Comeback

2006-04-20T19:19:00.000-05:00

His Rai-ness has graciously conceded to resurrect his blog!I am glad because his blog entries were my (almost) daily dose of laughter.He is a bit caught up with school and work nowadays and will probably not be as regular in posting....but its all good...at least he is back.Welcome back Rai!!

I'm Back!

2006-04-20T18:33:00.000-05:00

It feels strange to be blogging after so long.I guess I'll have to sort of get used to it....hehehe...it actually took me while to get into the "flow" of blogging once I started this blog.
The trip to Pakistan was great...very hectic but great!My best friend's wedding being the highight.Everything was perfect.This would have to be the most hassle free wedding I have ever attended...which is a big deal because officially I was "in" the wedding being the best friend and all....I mean,I didn't have to worry about what I'd be wearing because V had taken care of that already...so there were no "I don't have anything nice to wear" crisis!And since we got there wayyy before the wedding I got to spend some quality time with her.D managed to somehow take my spot as V's mother's confidante....I am glad though because I had actually worried about D feeling a little out of place.Anyways, V looked gorgeous and it didn't rain as predicted on the day of her wedding which was a big relief because the wedding was supposed to be out in the open in this massive garden.In all,it was a wonderful affair and we enjoyed it to the max.Before we knew it,it was time for us to leave.I was happy to be coming back home but was depressed at the same time...probably becuase of the studying(blech!) that awaited me.Yes,there were teary-eyed good-byes but guess what...V and her husband will probably be coming down to the US this summer.I shall hopefully be done with all my crappy exams and we'll definitely meet up!There is one thing that I do regret though...not being able to meet O-C in person...:(...I've had to endure her wrath for this...*gulp*.She had to be out of town till the 7th of april and because of the choked cell phone networks there I didn't get any of her messages telling me she was back!So,I just got to talk to her a couple of times and then once again the day I left, when she said,"I hate you and will kill you when I do see you!"I just want to say that the only thing I am guilty of is eating the chocolate I took for her...hehehe!!
So,I am back now...back to my books...back to worrying about meeting deadlines,targets and expectations.Its going alright ,but every now and then I feel low.It is then that I look at all the pictures we took in Pakistan....it somehow helps get me back on track.There is one more bit of news that I wanted to write about...I think I'll dedicate a seperate post to it!

2006-04-08T07:34:00.000-05:00

Finally got hold of a decent internet connection and some time...V is busy with some guests and her bro is out till the evening and i've sneaked into his room to check my e-mail.This will be short though...i have henna/mehndi on my left hand...yes,it looks beautiful...:).This trip has been great.The wedding is on monday and things are...well...crazy.We spent a week with our grandmother and after a tussle with a few more relatives finally managed to move to V's place.Its feels great to be part of all this.There is so much happening and i am loving every moment of it!a'rite...its too difficult to type with one finger...shall update in detail soon...probably when i get back home.Till then..

Randomly Random

2006-03-17T20:43:00.000-06:00

Since I am officially over mourning the fact that Rai killed(yes,I consider it homicide!) his blog,I thought I'd post.Just five more days and D and I will be off to Pakistan.D is more excited about this trip than me...she says its a good thing she works otherwise she'd have gone crazy thinking about it all the time!I think its probably because she'd be going back after four years and this will be a vacation in the real sense of the word, in a long long time for her.
I plan on making lists of "stuff to do" this weekend and pack too,while I am at it (I hate last minute packing).One of the first things I want to get out of the way when I get to Pakistan is, to go and badger the student affairs people at my college to get all my documents in order.They have proven to be lazy good-for-nothings the five years that I was there.I have heard some horror stories of people not having their credentials verified on time and having to lose out on applying for residency.Other than this I need to get recommendation letters.Now that is a seperate story altogether and I shall whine about that soon too!
Cousin "A"(the one in Atlanta) leaves for Pakistan in July for an internship.She called a couple of days ago and said she'd so want me to go with her.This would be the first time she'd be going to Pakistan alone.I would have loved to go with her but I'd be busy hunting for a much needed externship for myself at that time.Its a shame though because she tried to lure me into it by promising that this would be an all expense paid trip...sort of an early birthday present...hehehe...
O-C takes her USMLE step 2 CK tomorrow.I hope she does awesome on the exam.If there is one person I've seen multi-task...and do it well...it would have to be her!Best of luck O-C!!

p.s..Rai,I will be changing the link to your(deceased) blog to R.I.P.Let me know if and when you decide to resurrect it!

Missing!

2006-03-14T09:54:00.000-06:00

One of my favourite blogs has been deleted!
*(genuine)sniff *
At least that’s what the message says when I click on the link.
Bring it back Rai!!!

p.s: I am assuming this was a lame (albeit successful) publicity stunt courtesy Q. Now bring it back!

2006-03-09T21:14:00.000-06:00

I hate being taken for granted. Time and again, over the past few years ,I have been stupid enough to befriend people who’d use you , then dispose of you at their whim , actually have the nerve to jump right back when and as they please and expect to be treated like royalty. As much as I want to, I can’t pin the blame on them because I think the fault lies in me. I ,obviously am not a good judge of homo-sapiens. Its not that I don’t realize…..I just keep giving the other person the benefit of the doubt and that’s where it goes downhill. For the future, I really do need to learn to put my foot down when I come across people of the like because I am just plain sick of getting hurt!! Enough said….

Action Group Against Blogspot Ban In Pakistan

2006-03-04T06:39:00.000-06:00

The Pakistan government has very conveniently gone ahead and banned blogspot(amongst many other sites)on account of blogs hosting the Danish newpaper cartoons.This makes no sense....bloggers all across Pakistan have been denied access to their blogs.This, in the face of the fact that many of these blogs had actually condemned those cartoons!!
DrPak has started the "Action Group Against Blogspot Ban In Pakistan" in an effort to gather fellow bloggers to protest against this absurdity.With supposedly reliable news agencies like the BBC reporting that this ban has had no effect whatsoever on Pakistani bloggers....it is imperative that a collective effort be made to get the real story across!

Countering Boredom

2006-03-02T16:35:00.000-06:00

Little S thinks he should "learn how to keep my big mouth shut".Today, he told his teacher that he was bored to death in class.So,he was given a "brain workout" in which he was supposed to learn to spell a bunch of words,look up their meanings AND use them in a story!!*sniff*He just wrote this and brought it to me....I haven't stopped laughing ever since!
(The new words S learnt today all end with an "ous" and are in bold)

"Once upon a time,there was a manly man named S.He was not only tremendous,famous,vicious(not that much though),adventurous,vigorous but also courteous and humorous.He had been getting cooler and cooler these previous years.Everyone was so jealous of him.One day a ridiculous,dangerous but nervous boy named T-Rock challenged him to a break-dancing competition.Now,T-Rock was mischievous and put venomous and treacherous barbie dolls in the dance arena!Barbie dolls were the most boisterous and dangerous creatures in the land.
The next day S walked onto the dance floor looking very ambitious.T-Rock looked like a frilly little girl.Then,the barbies started attacking T-Rock.He was devoured while S just got cooler.The continous dance competition was remembered.Everyone lived happily ever after except T-Rock who turned into a barbie girl!"

V's Gift

2006-03-01T15:26:00.000-06:00

Around this time last year , my final year exams had just ended and I was heading back home. V(my best friend) came to drop me off at the airport and as we said our final good-byes she slipped this into my hand.A treat to have.... it is one of my most prized possessions to date. V had just got this a couple of months ago from Saudi-Arabia and as she handed it to me, I had protested with a “But you just got it! Keep it. I’ll get one for myself soon.”.....to no avail.
I had felt guilty about having deprived V of her digital Quran.She called a couple of weeks later....some one she knew had just given her the exact same thing as a gift!!!

Tired

2006-02-28T20:19:00.000-06:00

So tired and stuck with about two more hours of work!! Need to get down to taking early morning starts and make the most of the day …am so not an evening person! I am listening to these lectures by this guy for medicine….he seems to be a cross between Ross(from Friends…looks a bit like him) and Ray(from Everybody loves Raymond…talks like him).I am afraid the similarity ends here....he is sooo boring!So yeah, I should get back to work before I feel too sorry for myself and give up.
Oh, and I just binged on M n Ms and skittles…..

2006-02-26T00:00:00.000-06:00

Note to self: Never have any caffeine close to bed time!

I had to put in two more hours  of studying to end a productive day…only my mind was just numb. So, I drank some diet coke…which did pep me up and I got through those two hours…and now I can’t go to sleep!*sigh* Thought I’d ramble here for a while….hopefully this will do the trick.
S and I haven’t been on the best of terms lately.  I am sure he can come up with a million reasons for why I am the bane of his existence …but I think its mainly because I cut his junk food consumption a.k.a Mc D’s etc to no more than twice a week and minimized his coke/pepsi intake too(btw…one can of that stuff has an equivalent of 8-9 teaspoons of sugar!).
Today, was somewhat of a surprise as he wasn’t all cheeky….he let me study without the usual…. “ahh!there you go…why are you checking your mail?you call that studying?”
In the evening, he came and asked me if I could come down with him into the basement for a while while he got onto the tread mill! I stopped myself from making some wise crack …hehehehe…and went downstairs. He started walking and we had a nice little discussion about what the thumb pulse meant and how it changed with exercise. “This isn’t that bad….he probably is quite fond of me”,I thought. I was mistaken. I realized he had been walking for about 20 minutes and I needed to pray and  get back to studying…..told S to get off. He would’t listen. Frustrated, I said, “S!I think this is enough. Aya does 30, so you’re fine”. “Oh you’re just a frilly little girl!! I can double what you do anyday!”,came the reply.
Enough niceness,I say. The next time I’ll sneak back upstairs and leave him all alone in the dreary, dark basement…then we’ll see who  the “frilly little girl is”!
Off now…and this didn’t work…still not sleepy.

What Bush really meant

2006-02-24T12:30:00.000-06:00

This is hilarious!!!

u bz?

2006-02-22T15:26:00.000-06:00

So, what exactly does it take, other than the “busy” status on your instant messenger to make people understand that you are actually, truly, positively busy??!!
The “ ignore strategy” works but then be prepared to be labelled mean/snobbish blah!blah!.....not to mention the explaination as to why you were busy!
I normally ignore IMs coming my way when I am working or am not in the mood for virtual socialising.....but this particular individual was adamant today.

*bling and out pops the window*

B: Hey! u bz?

*Aya shuts down window remorselessly*

*bling accompanied by window a minute later*

B:u there?
Aya: hey…whats up?
B: hey…r u bz?
Aya: yes…kinda sorta!Everything ok?
B:haan everythings ok.So,whats happening?Anything interesting…anything new?
Aya: good.No,nothing new.Same old,same old.Work ok for you?
B: yeah,Works ok.Come on now…there has to be something happening…kya boring insaan ho!
Aya:sorry to disappoint you B but I don’t have a life and there is nothing happening that might interest you.
B: hmmm….sad! btw…you’re boring!:p
Aya: I know..:p…I am off now……catch you later.

*Aya shuts window…logs out!*

Spread The Word

2006-02-20T15:12:00.000-06:00

The following is an excerpt from DrPak's latest blog entry.

“I strongly condemn the publication of the bigoted and offensive cartoons against the Prophet. However, I condemn in much stronger terms the violent reaction some Muslims have had to the publication. This reaction runs totally counter to my Islamic beliefs. They must be stopped immediately with an exhaustive investigation launched to arrest and punish the perpetrators. As a Muslim, mindless violence in the name of Islam is far more insulting to me than for an ill-informed, publicity-seeking newspaper to publish cartoons of my Prophet (pbuh).”

I concur.
More on this, here.

S-isms...

2006-02-19T20:17:00.000-06:00

What is this world coming to??
I just have  to share this conversation that I just had with my 10 year old brother S, whose life is currently… and I quote…”miserable” because he has to study(like an hour on alternate days)  for the fifth grade achievement tests coming up .So, D is going over this practice test he just did and pointing out his mistakes….

S: “Well D…even if I got this wrong I’d still get a 90, you know?”
Aya: “ S! Its not good to be so overconfident!”
S: “Let me explain .You and I are a combination of mama and baba(mom and dad).One of us has to have  lower confidence and the other has to have higher confidence.I guess you got stuck with the ahem…*cough* lower thingee .Its  a gene/DNA thing Aya…it’s a gene/DNA thing!”  *cheeky yet angelic grin*
Aya: “Err…S….”
S: “You remember how you were right before you  took  your exam? Heyy   wait….but you got good grades!!” *leaves room pondering*

Happy Birthday O-C!!

2006-02-17T16:28:00.000-06:00

May all your dreams come true and more...
May you get what you want...;)
Have fun.... (of course, you owe me some cake!!)

Disconcertion...

2006-02-15T07:40:00.000-06:00

Deeply perturbed over the so called protests that have erupted in Pakistan in Lahore,Peshawar and Islamabad and a number of other cities over the Danish newspaper cartoons.I had actually been dreading this for a few days now.Yes....we are affronted but it certainly doesnot justify these random acts of violence...what exactly would burning your own assembly building,banks,cinemas and retaurants accomplish?!I believe that our own short comings as an ummah have paved the way for this ridicule and disregard ...we need to clean up our acts first and foremost!!